Living in the NOW vs. Taking Goal-Directed Action

One of my biggest challenges, personally, has been the propensity to live in the FUTURE (via worrying, counting chickens before they hatch, etc.) while taking NON-GOAL DIRECTED ACTION (sitting at my laptop and surfing the internet, reading sports discussion boards, etc., as opposed to getting on the phone and calling people, following up, work that will get me closer to my goal).

I call upon the dissonance matrix yet again (thanks again, Gary Kennedy). This time with a little twist, though.

It’s interesting to note that, even WITHOUT either “living in the NOW” or “taking goal-directed ACTION” (which would necessitate goals, of course), just having ONE of the two would be far better than my propensity to do the complete opposite of both. Just as maximizing two seemingly mutually exclusive ideas or concepts can unlock competitive advantage, doing the inverse is like shooting yourself in the foot and then blaming the gun.

Why is it that “living in the NOW” is so difficult for me? My initial guess is that I grew up dreaming about possibilities or worried about consequences of action AND inaction that I now have a habit of thinking myself into corners. Any action has a potential negative effect, in so to avoid the possible negative effect of my choice, I choose to remain inactive but consider my thinking to be work and stepping in the right direction.

What about “taking goal-directed action?” Like I alluded to before, it necessitates a goal. And for some reason, I have this perfectionist complex that makes setting goals difficult for me because I’m afraid I can’t do it. I’m giving up on dreams because I’m not worth it or because there’s no way I’m going to accomplish my dreams. So I close myself off to making goals because I’m a pessimist.

Two concepts have helped me deal with this. One, the idea that NOW is the only thing I have control over, and therefore the only thing I can change. I cannot change the past, because it’s already happened. I cannot predict the future, but I can work towards goals knowing that if every moment I choose to do something that gets me one step closer to my goal, I will have succeeded in that moment.

The other is the idea that goals should be based on the kind of person I want to BE, not on what I want to HAVE in my life. Having will be a natural outcome of my Being the best person I can be. It’s up to me to identify what attributes and characteristics define what it means to BE my best self. Doing the things that help me acquire those attributes will lead me to becoming that which I would like to BE. And therefore, if I am BEING all I can be, I will be blessed with EXACTLY that which merit allows me to have.

Life. The Art of Sneezing. Linked as ridiculous concepts from which one can find joy.

Intro to "Dissonance Matrix"

“He who knows everything but is unaware is an informed fool.

He who is aware but knows little is an uninformed sage.”
(a quote often used by Robert Hartman)

So comes the question: which would you rather be?

Again, though they may seem mutually exclusive to some, these can both be improved upon at the same time to maximize the overall impact. Similar to my “map vs. GPS” analogy and subsequent rethinking, it’s yet another application of the same principle, something a man I respect and look up to calls the “dissonance matrix.” (Gary Kennedy, CEO of remedyMD).

The dissonance matrix can be represented by a simple graph, two axes, and on each axis you have one of two seemingly mutually exclusive qualities. Let us take the example above, knowledge and awareness. On one axis, the one labeled knowledge, you could maximize the value of this, but conventional wisdom says you can only have one or the other, thus the “informed fool” moniker. On the other hand, you can maximize the awareness factor, but again conventional wisdom says you can’t have both, so you will be an uninformed sage. Honestly, if I had to pick one, I would pick the latter.

However, there is another possibility that is often ignored, that of the informed sage. Why can one not maximize both of these qualities? Can you imagine what life would be like if there were more informed sages walking the earth?

Don’t limit the possibilities of the dissonance matrix, either. I’m not yet a master of its application, Gary Kennedy may be one of the few alive.

Yet another man I respect and look up to, Bonner Ritchie’s term “Scholar-Leader” is, I believe, the best term I can think of to describe what a person is who maximizes both knowledge AND awareness.

Life. The Art of Sneezing. Linked as ridiculous concepts from which one can find joy.